Are you suffering through a dry spell? Are you just not getting any? You’re not alone in this world. Due to a variety of societal factors, millennials just aren’t having the same amount of sex that older generations did. Studies show that the newest generation is waiting longer to have sex in the first place, and is too distracted by technology to want to.
There are a ton of factors at work here competing and collaborating to create a situation where sex just isn’t as common. There are various studies that have come to differing conclusions that are not necessarily at odds with one another as to why this is all happening. Also, don’t worry, we’re not headed toward the extinction of the human race. However, understanding the underpinnings of why this is happening can help you understand the factors in your own life that could be keeping you from getting some and going about ways to solve that problem.
Technology gets a lot of the blame in these studies for why millennials are not getting as much sex as prior generations.
We’re distracted. We’d rather be on our phones. And while you might be getting your ire up at this kind of stereotyping… there actually is empirical data that suggests that younger men would rather be playing video games than having sex. Empirical data shows that Millennial men rated sex below video games in terms of enjoyment and satisfaction. But there have to be more factors at work. If you take a look at the comparison between Generation X and Millennials, there has been a sharp decline in the percentage of teenagers who had sex by the age of 18. Generation X had video games too. So, there’s more to this. There’s more to this just looking at technology, in fact.
Another technological factor, the constant tether or leash to work that your smartphone has become.
You are 100% of the time available to your boss or workplace via the phone in your hands and that creates an expectation of constantly being at work. This is a distraction and a source of incredible stress that can kill libido and sex drive.
Our phones keep us from connecting on a physical and emotional level with someone.
The rise of the dating app and hook up website has put much more pressure on physical appearance in the dating scene. Furthermore, it creates a superficial relationship with someone even before getting to meet them face to face. This can create differing expectations about where everything is going when an in-person meeting finally takes place. So, some slight good news in terms of stereotyping there. Millennials aren’t the dating-app fueled hook up generation riddled with STDs that so many feared we would be when those apps first emerged and ended up becoming popular. But dating has become a shallow experience. We’re leaving out the mystery of a first date, and getting to know someone beforehand. The internet and social media have destroyed mystery. But it’s not just technology that is holding us back, there are economic and social factors as well.
So, what kind of economic and social factors are at work?
Well, the main one that social scientists point to is the number of millennials that are living at home with their parents again — or still. If both partners are still crashing on mom and dad’s couches, or in the basements, or in their childhood bedrooms, then they’re less likely to be able to ask them to go back to their place for a night of passion. If you’re still sleeping in a bedroom adjacent to your parents, then that’s really going to cramp your style. You have your parents snoring away like a bad roommate, killing any vibe you could potentially get going. It’s just not going to work out well for your sex life. And the percentage of millennials living at home for economic reasons — high rates of student loan debt, for instance — is so much higher than prior generations. This is easy to point to as a source of why rates of sex are dropping, and the age at which people are first having sex is increasing.
Some of the data supporting the theory that millennials are having less sex comes from the condom industry.
They’re seeing lower sales. Not as many condoms being solid could just be seen as people favoring less-safe birth control. People could just be using the rhythm method and pulling out. But in conjunction with the other statistics out there, that just doesn’t add up. The source of the lower condom sales is the decrease in sex rates among the younger generations. Other statistics such as the decrease in the number of different sexual partners from prior generations show this too. Though this is more of a parabola. Generations prior to the baby boomers — such as the greatest generation — had significantly fewer sexual partners. Those were more conservative times though.
Other social factors that influence the decrease in the rate of sex are how long teenagers stay teens.
18 year olds — behavior-wise — are more like 15 year olds of only a generation ago. This could be influenced by other social factors and by parenting styles of the time, but it’s interesting that these social factors have occurred simultaneously with adolescents waiting longer to have sex for the first time, generally.
None of this necessarily means that you can’t have a healthy sex life or give it a boost.
Just because millennials are slowing things down doesn’t mean that you can’t do things to meet someone and have a nice night in with them tonight. There are plenty of steps that you can take to boost your own libido and drive to get going. If you’re in a relationship, put your phone down and connect with your significant other. If you’re in a serious relationship, it may seem unromantic, but you can build toward a habit of more spontaneous sex by eliminating distractions in the bedroom and scheduling some alone time with just the two of you. Hey, maybe you can start a trend to totally turn this thing around.